So, for those of you who don’t know, me and my lovely OH recently got engaged (yay)! Getting engaged is a moment that I’m sure many girls dream about from when they’re really little (I know I did!), and it’s such an exciting and lovely thing when it happens. I think I was smiling for about 3 weeks straight after the proposal. Then comes the telling your friends and family bit, which is also really really exciting. But for me, the first few weeks I spent being engaged, it almost felt like it was just an amazing, but totally surreal dream. My OH hadn’t proposed with a ring, because he wanted me to pick one, so we spent a little while picking a ring and then waiting for it to arrive (which for some reason, made it feel even more surreal) – and then the ring arrived, and I put it on and realisation kicked in…
We’re actually getting married. Oh my god. WHERE DO WE START?
We also found ourselves being asked questions from everyone we know… When are you getting married? Where are you getting married? Who will your bridesmaids/groomsmen be? What sort of wedding will you have?
Safe to say, within the past few weeks, we’ve had a lot of chats about the sort of weddings we want, when and where we’d want to get married and even had a look at some venues online to get an idea of what we like/don’t like. And, having decided that we won’t be getting married til summer 2017, we’re both feeling under a lot less pressure to make any haste decisions. But it’s taken a few conversations and realisations before we got to this much-more-relaxed point.
So, having experienced this ‘OMG what do I do now’ moment, I thought I would share a few tips for any newly engaged couples who are feeling this way too – as well as a few questions that it’s thinking about before you get started making plans.
First and foremost, just don’t fret about anything. Don’t let families or friends pressure you into making a decisions about ANYTHING until you’re ready to. If you want a little while to take it all in and just enjoy being newly engaged then that’s perfectly okay.
Starting a couple of Pinterest boards was my way of starting to think about things, without really making any decisions or having to look at serious things like costs etc. It’s also a much more fun way to get good ideas and narrow down the styles and ideas that you both like.
Think about the sort of wedding you’ll both want
Nothing too serious. You might have already discussed certain ideas with your OH – I know that me and Lee had chatted quite a bit about wedding ideas we both liked before we got engaged – but now that you’re engaged, it’s worth discussing properly things like time of year/close to home or destination/huge event or small, close-family and friends/types of venues. These are a few basic questions that will help you to narrow the rest of your choices down and stop it from all becoming a bit overwhelming. If you’ve been to lots of other weddings, then they could provide you with some ideas of things you both like/don’t like.
Work out what sort of budget you’re looking at
Unfortunately, at some point, you have to have the money talk. If you and your partner are paying for the wedding, then you’ll need to work out how much you want to spend. If you’re lucky enough to have family helping out, then have a chat to see how much they think they can help with. It will help you in the long run, as it means you can start working out the sort of wedding you’ll be able to afford.
Scope out potential venues
Again, this can be fun to do through Pinterest, or by scouring the numerous wedding websites out there for information and pictures from other peoples ‘real weddings’. We knew that we wanted a barn style wedding, and we wanted it to be local, so for us, it was a case of googling ‘barn weddings somerset’ and looking through other people’s wedding photos online. It gives you a much better idea of the actual venue that the venue’s own photos might.
Decide on your bridal party
This may well be one that you’ve had worked out long before you got engaged, but it’s still something that’s worth doing early-on-ish. I know some people get super stressed with this, and it can be tricky if you have lots of close friends or family who are scoping out for a place as a bridesmaid or groomsmen. But the fact is that it’s your wedding, and so you need your bridal party to be the people who make you happy, will keep you calm on the wedding day and stag/hen party, and who you know won’t cause any issues. It’s as simple as that.
So there you go – those are my tips for things to think about and do when you first get engaged.
In my next post, I’ll be talking you through some of the venue options I’ve scoped out so far. Stay tuned!